Black Light Affair

It was lovely. The girl im crazy about came and we had a blast. Definitely makes me feel the need to go to Jersey often. We click, we have similar goals and wants. What does this mean???? She is practically what i want in a female. She is absolutely gorgeous, has a head on her shoulders and loves family. Plus Cali is both where we want to be. I hope things work out. Lord help me.

:)

I want a pet bear

Whiskey

Richardon

This is how I am dancing Saturday

Cool Beans

Im Hype

Gator Grabs Patrol Car

Tupac showin Dukie Love

Marvin's Room with a personal memoir

It took me a while to finally sit down to type this. This song has brought up so many memories and evoked so many feelings. I've been on that end of the phone, drunk out of my mind, trying to get that one girl to come over. I've been asked "Are you drunk right now?". Not for the obvious always, sometimes the company is just nice. But with my ex, this song relates all too much. This song made me remember all the things I did for her. I loved her unconditionally, but she didnt love me unconditionally. I wasn't allowed to make mistakes. The many times she was hammered drunk and I was always there to care for her. "just throw up while i hold your hair back", ive been there. I never bitched about the many things you would say or do to hurt me. But I fuck up because I notice shady shit about you and you get mad at me. Don't get that. We stopped being "boyfriend and girlfriend" because you didn't want titles. So we just went on being in a relationship without titles. However, you had no problem hopping into one with this guy. That's why I cut all contact off with you. That was a bitch move. Consider peoples feelings. So I wasnt good enough for you I guess. Like the song, fuck that dude. I have that feeling towards him and he might not even deserve it. None of this is his fault, he isnt in the wrong. Truthfully I don't even know if you are with the same guy or not or with anyone at all. Haven't cared enough to check. I do know you can do better. When it comes to relationships, no one can out do me. Name one thing I didn't do for you when asked. I would drop whatever I was doing to do whatever you asked. The many times I took you to get your hair done, picking you up from work in Newport News when I lived in Norfolk, buying you clothes, feeding you, taking care of you when you were drunk, buying tampons, getting you midol for your cramps, going to get sushi when I dont even eat sushi, spending mad money on you for Christmas to receive nothing for myself, when you wanted to pop adderall and it ended up making you sick and I cared for. The list goes on. I never bitched about doing anything. I just did because I thought you were appreciative and thats just what "boyfriends" do. After we would make love, you would always look me in my eyes and tell me how much you loved me. I always responded with I love you more. Its clear, I loved you more. But that's the past. I've moved on as have you. Took me a while but I am fine with it. I am over you, but I would be a liar if I said I didn't miss you sometimes. I havent had what we had with someone else before, so its easy to miss. However, I know your true colors and getting back together in the future really doesnt appeal to me. I do hope your father gets out of the mess he is in though, although I will likely never meet him, he deserves to be home. I have a new woman in my life now and hopefully that works out. Thats it, I really had to get it off my chest. Bye

PS-Donating my shorts was real ass hole move. Plus you gave me a pair of shorts that arent mine. How classy of you.

Lovely Quote

"When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down "happy". They told me I didn’t understand the assignment.I told them they didn’t understand life."

— John Lennon