Vacation

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Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween guys! Hope ure weekend was fun and safe.

Gumby and Q from Day 26 or Tyrese. you choose

Ice Box

I really hated this song back in the day. Hey its relevant tho.

Melyssa Ford

:) I would argue that she is the most beautiful women I have seen

Self Relization

The past few days i've realized somethings about myself. I dont take change well and I hate when others move on from things faster than me. I'm a complicated person and I don't see it changing. Hate it or love it, its me.

How I feel

pretty much

It's so hard....

...to give up something you love.

DOOM

When I was a young lad, back in like 93 and 94, my dad used to play this game allllllllllllllll the time on the computer. He would play my uncle over a modem(tells you how long ago it was). The game they played was called DOOM. I'm not sure if everyone back then played it but it changed my life forever. I started playing while my dad was at work(yes at 3 and 4 years old), and I got realll good. It was really the first first person shooter of its kind. Realize, without DOOM, there is no Halo or the like. The game was so scary and just kind of blew me away. A few days ago it popped it my head and i searched to see if I could play it. Well they have the first DOOM on facebook and it is pretty much the original. Also if you got Xbox Live, you can download DOOM and DOOM II from the arcade or from the Apple app store for your ipod or iphone. Yea the graphics aren't great to today's standards, but you will see that even though the game is 17 years old, its still awesome. I recommend you go play it.


AWESOME

White Chocolate Mocha

i'm addicted......

The Weather is Being a Dick

The Weather is Being a Dick - watch more funny videos

I laughed

I Need Love

damn man, im sick without it. Literally

All Good Things Must Come to an End

Since August of 2009, I have had a lot of fun with you. But it's time to move on from my Cobra. That's right folks, im selling my beloved Cobra. Not out of choice, but because I could really use the funds. I had envisioned really turning it into something special that I could pass down to my kids or something, but i've had enough. I put it on craigslist Monday and have already got people coming to look at it. I was kind of bummed to be selling it. However i have come around. I always wanted a Mustang ever since my neighbor bought one in 1994. I remember, a black 95 Ford Mustang GT convertible. So damn clean it was. Another neighbor of mine owned two Mustangs, a 96 GT and then later a 99 Cobra. My first ride in a Mustang was the 99 Cobra and I told myself after that, that I must have one. So, I had a steady job and graduation money coming out the ass and i decided to buy this 1995 Cobra. It's been a blast, I have never lost a race hahaha. I've been challenged so many times and dusted everyone. I'm proud to say i have had only one speeding ticket the whole time, which is a shock to me. But the reign is over. Now its back to the good ol' MX-6. Maybe i'll buy somethin in January.
Here is the craigslist ad and no, I refuse to sell the car to any of my friends. There is only one person that I would consider and he can't. But only because his family owns a bunch of Mustangs. I dont want it breaking then have to hear your ass. anywho.
http://norfolk.craigslist.org/cto/2025657480.html

I Can't Sleep Baby

Sleep deprived for pretty much similar reasons. Fuck

Brett Favre

please retire. Watching you hobble around the field with the ankle that obviously is not full strength is hard to watch. I am a big Favre fan and I wish him the best. But after last season, I wish he would have hung it up. Yes they lost in the NFC championship game, but it's not like he didn't have an awesome season. Did anyone really believe at age 41, with a bad ankle and elbow issues that he was gonna come back gunnin? I definitely didn't. I feel bad for the Vikings since he is the reason they are 2-4. If Tavaris Jackson played this whole time then they could be 4-2 or around that ball park. You got 500+ TD's, now it's time to go.

Hurting

I hurt all over. My mind,heart,body, and soul. I feel like crap today.

Week of Fuckery

this week blew in all aspects. very few bright spots. i was lazy as shit and did nothing productive. the job hunt is still on with no calls yet. things in life got more complicated because obviously i dont have enough going on. i did get to see red n meth and go to my first odu football game, but other than that it was a major dud. hopefully next week is a vast improvement. halloween will suck because i have no money for a costume tho. birthday is in two n a half weeks and i could really give two fucks. with that said, dont expect a party or anything as of now. i dont want anything either, there is only one thing i want and chances are astronomical you cant give it to me so yea, dont bother. bye bye

Opening Acts

99% of opening acts suck. I can't stand it. I didn't pay $30 to sit through hell, get off the stage. I see the trick now is to go to concerts about and hour and a half after the show is supposed to start so I can see who I paid to see. However, Red and Meth were dope. Redman is fuckin crazy. Out.

Joe Budden- Mood Muzik 4

This shit is way over due. Finally Mood Muzik part 4 is here. These mixtapes are all excellent. It wasn't supposed to come out until Tuesday but it was leaked and you can download here.

1. Intro (Pray For Me)
2. Aftermath
3. Role Reversal
4. Come Along
5. Mop Salad (Skit)
6. Sober Up (Feat. Crooked I)
7. Dessert 4 Thought (Feat. Styles P & Pusha T)
8. 1000 Faces
9. Inseperable
10. The Shoes (Skit)
11. Remember The Titans (Feat. Fabolous, Lloyd Banks & Royce Da 5′9″)
12. Welcome To Real Life
13. No Idea
14. Black Cloud
15. Follow Your Lead
16. Stuck In The Moment
17. If All Else Fails
If you haven't heard the other mixtapes, i highly recommend you go download.

Godfrey at ODU

This year for ODU's homecoming week, they had the comedian Godfrey come to do some stand-up. Last year Ben Bailey came and I missed it, I was pretty pissed especially since I had a ticket. So even though I was gonna be by myself, I made sure I went this year. I was laughing the whole time. Stand-up comedy is my favorite type of comedy because it is so pure. It genius. Back to Godfrey, normally you would think he would only do old bits being that its at a college, but no, he was joking about stuff involving ODU and current events. I was very pleased. Here are some clips from older stand-ups from Godfrey.

Jamie Foxx- Unpredictatable

I am very confident that many of you lost your virginity to this album. But hey, it has good reasoning behind it. Great album and almost guaranteed to get you some ass if played.

Aston Martin Music or Paris Morton Music

This is really one of my favorite beats ever. J.U.S.T.I.C.E. League are my favorite producers in the game right now. No one in my opinion is close. I didn't buy Rick Ross' albums for just lyrics. They are on every album. This song has stuck with me more than most. Notably the Drake cut. Here's the making of...

The Vid

video is nearly perfect to me. if you bought the album like me, Drake does not have a verse on it. The Paris Morton Music version is Drake by himself or the Aston Martin remix. The Drake version by himself is an all time fave already. The song is very very good lyrically.

I prefer the longer intro also.

The Current Rotation

So normally with music i go through phases. I'll listen to one artist a lot for like a week then switch. Past like two weeks ive been hooked on some songs and most contain Drake. I've really become a big fan of his. I didn't really care for Thank Me Later at first but I have definitely come around. Anywho here is my current tracks I got on repeat.
Devil in a new Dress- Kanye

Ye has been really hit and miss to me. This beat is ridiculous tho.
Lil Wayne and Drake- With You

Can't speak for the rest of the album but this is grade A.
Deuces remix-Drake,3000,Ye

Drake>Andre>Ye

Meth and Red in Norfolk on friday

i'll be in attendance thanks to the buddy ol pal Keenan Jackson.

Lupe Fiasco- Switch

The sole reason i started to listen to Lupe.

NFL=No Fun League

The title speaks for itself. Due to this past weekend, there has been all these complaints of helmet to helmet hits in football. One of my fantasy players, DeSean Jackson, was one of the several players to leave games with a concussion. Sorry, its fucking football. What do you expect? People watch football to see the crushing hits on defense. My favorite player ever, Sean Taylor, was notorious for it before his death. Let the game be played. All these hits are not intentional. When two guys are running as fast as they can at each other and the defender puts his head down to tackle, sometimes a helmet to helmet collision will happen, its a bang bang play. The players in the NFL chose to play football, stop bitching and let them play. Fining guys is dumb. I just read a post in which the NFL although bitching about player safety, is selling photos of the James Harrison of the Steelers hit on Mohamed Massaquoi of the Browns here.

NFL, stop being so hypocritical. let them play, its not like they arent getting paid millions.

Heavy Rotation

Life is Hard

It's been nearly six months since my last post. This year has been crazy. A lot of high points and a more of the lowest of the lows. The first time in my life i've really questioned my purpose. Do I even have one? that i dont know still. Any who, since April a lot of shit has changed. I finished up my second semester at ODU and did absolutely horrible. First time ive seen an F on any type of transcript. I lost my parents trust a bit, I gotta ball this semester currently or the funding for it goes out the window. My dad doesnt believe i'll make it. Thinks my priorities are all tied up. Maybe he is right. I'm too worried about gettin drunk and blowin money than my future. It could come back to bite me in the ass. But so far so good this Fall semester, only A's and B's. This summer was definitely one to remember. Not even looking, I found someone special. Definitely out of the ordinary, a person that I felt so strongly about so soon. It was crazy. It wasnt but a few weeks and I was saying "I love you". It was odd cuz i wasnt just saying it, i felt every ounce of the word when i said it. I never felt a love like that. I found what I was looking for in a girlfriend, someone who could match the amount of love I had for them. I hope you all find it one day because it is probably the single greatest feeling ever. Whenever the world is down on you, you always know you got that person that will always be there, to love you no matter what. Its electrifying. Its magical. Every thought contains that person no matter what. You just wanna do whatever you can to make that person happy. When they are down, you are down. When they are happy, you are happy. I felt this so much. We have had our ups and downs. More ups tho, I can admit ive never been happier. I didnt have a care in the world. But, I fucked up. Now i really believe its over. Im in the lowest of the lows. I want a way to just reach happiness. Im not happy. Im sick. Im depressed. Nothing can cheer me up, ive tried. I hide it when im around my roommate in such, but deep down im crying every second. It was all my fault and I can't take it back. I got her believing im a totally different person than I am. Idk what came over me, but I feel horrible. Something that really means the world to me, I just had to break it. Now im regretting it. I hate myself. I really do, how could i be so dumb? I have had a pit in my stomach since. It wont go away, ive tried. Everything reminds me of her. The slightest things. A simple song that I know we listened to together, i have to skip cuz it chokes me up inside. No one has an answer for me or at least the answer i want to hear. I really think its over. But someone told me, "if she comes back its meant to be". Well dammit, i hope its meant to be. Ive never wanted something so bad. Its sad cuz im the sole reason. I thought I was such a good guy, maybe im not. Maybe I need to lose something that I cherish as a life lesson. I hope not. At 19, i honestly found someone that I want to be there when im 84 or what have you. Im scared, i really dont like change. It seems my life always throws me curveballs. My job I had for 3 and half years, I got fired from. I was devastated. It's not like I was fired for stealing or what have you, It was an honest mistake. It was so hard for my manager, cuz it wasnt his choice. My store is literally like a family. We all look out for each other. No matter the occasion. My boss stood up for me so many times and taught me so many life lessons. I love that guy, he was literally like a father figure. Anything i needed he would help me with. I miss my job so much. It's not like the money was great, but I just never had an issue with going. The staff we had at the current time is the best ive had there. I enjoyed working with everyone. Even though the drive sucked, I wasnt ready to leave. I filed for unemployment and ive put in many apps. But no calls and my unemployment checks still havent come in. Whenever i try to call about it, its always a voice automated service. I fucking hate that. Im strugglin. I owe my parents money, ive almost maxed out my credit card and I still havent paid my Cobra off. I moved to Norfolk as a way to get out of my parents hair and to get some freedom while being close to ODU. Not to mention close to the love of my life. My weekends suck though. All my friends are in Hampton. I miss them so much. I really need to meet people at ODU, but most that I meet I dont like. I wanna go party, experience college life tho. If you are really a friend of mine, you should cherish it. Not to sound like an ass hole, but I dont let very many people into my life because I dont care to be around many people. Just cuz you are my friend on Facebook, doesnt mean you are my friend. Likely you are an associate. I'm broke, which i havent had an issue with since my sophomore of high school. I cant just go do the things that I want to. I want to buy movies that come out or go out. But the funds arent there. Ive relied on my parents a lot, and im tired of it. I feel like its not letting me turn into an adult. I thought i achieved it and then reality slapped me in the face. My parents only make but so much money. Both my parents have only high school education. My mom only makes but so much as a teacher assistant and my dads job status changes always. Verizon isnt doing well, so he could lose his job at anytime. And then we are fucked. My brother in law works for Verizon too, he might lose his job also. Which would be great since of course my sister and him just bought a house not long ago and my niece just turned one. Fuck life i swear. Those of you that know me closely, know i suffered a gigantic tragedy in my 9th grade year. I had a house fire. I lost everything. Luckily for my family, we werent at the house. We were in Florida, talk about the greatest spring break ever. Its the first time ive ever had an experience with drugs. My cousin addicted to crack, broke in and stole tons of stuff and sold it on the street for crack. Mysteriously my house burns down that week. They couldnt tie him to the house fire, but he got grand theft and was let out just about a month ago. I hate him with all my heart. The thought of him makes me angry. My grandparents who I love dearly came to his rescue and are allowing him to stay at their house. My opinion of them has changed dramatically. I could care less about them I thought. Then i find out my grandfather is pretty sick, I dont know how to feel. Im distraught. I love them so much but they hurt my family so bad. I wanna see them, but my cousin prevents me or my family from doing it. It sucks, i'm crying as I type this. I'm afraid to go, the sight of my cousin might make me go crazy. Life sucks. My uncle used to say it all the time when I was younger and i always thought how could he say such a thing, life is great. I understand him now. I hate it. I could never go off the deep end or what have you. There is just no way out. I wish everything would just be normal. But that will never happen. Im just waiting for something else to happen. I might really die of stress before I turn twenty. Im not a religious person what so ever. If i had to declare a denomination i guess I would say Christian. I talk to my God every now and then and I pray things will get better. Sometimes I feel like things are looking up and then it changes. I dont know what to do. I search for answers and i cant find them. I try to do my best and its not enough, its disappointing. I really feel like im just bitching, but I gotta get it out somehow. I really hope no one reads this, but if you do, dont go around saying hey go read that post n shit. This is really just my method of getting my thoughts out of my head for a bit. I dont have a journal, so this will suffice. But just know, life is hard. Its not all its cracked up to be. Much love.